pile of journals

pile of journals

I guess I probably should have taken this photo after a pedicure…:) But as always , a picture can say a thousand words (or even more ).  I hadn’t planned on my foot being there- hmmm-one foot in…(where’s the other foot? )
Feels to me as it I have been on a precipice of some huge shift for a while now.  The Fool as he playfully hedges  toward the cliff.  The Tower crumbling around all around me as my preconceived notions and plans made by my ego go flying out the window.  I like Joe , face the volcano of my fears.  Time to jump in with BOTH FEET.
Below is a picture of my very first Human Design Journal.  It took me  over 2 years to complete.  It started out as a simple wide-ruled composition book.  Now it is so thick and chock full of images and pull-outs and pop-outs I can barely keep it closed.  
Inspired by my Third graders’ reading journals I decided to create something very special from something very ordinary.  Kinda like all of us- Infinite Beings hiding in atoms and molecules and chemicals wrapped in flesh and blood and bone.
Each page of my HD journal is dedicated to an aspect of my own unique design.  For of those of you who haven’t heard of Human Design- it is this very cool combination of astrology, the I-Ching, the chakra system and the ancient Kabbalah .  Each of our charts are calculated (like astrology) by the exact time of birth.  Over the past few years I have had “readings” and sessions with all kinds of Human Design practitioners of all kinds.  I am so grateful for their wisdom and guidance.  Like any “new” system (Human Design was channeled through guy about 25 years ago) it is evolving as we are evolving.  
Because we are all so different and learn so uniquely  (any good teacher can tell you that ) different approaches to Human Design will appeal to different people.  Some of my favorite “work” has been with my good friend and wise counselor- Kim Gould.  Her take on emergent astrology (asteroid placement in our chart) is phenomenal and speaks to my Jungian approach to …everything !
HD journal

journal tulips

journal tulips

I realize I have not finished my first post on movies and clones…but that will have to wait.  I recently bought a domain name- The Journal Queen.   I have so many visual journals . I  even have journals about my journals.  
I began my first visual journal  in 1995 when I was in graduate school .  I was engaged to be married -but I was an emotional mess , and no amount of “talking about” it seemed to help me figure out what to do.  I remember one of my classmates saying to me- why don’t you start a journal ?   She and I had bonded in our Expressive Arts class (my graduate studies were in Holistic Counseling)- and she knew that the artist in me was “who” would help guide me to the answers I was seeking.  Her question was an invitation that changed my life. Thank you. Cathy- wherever you are.
I think I needed “permission” to go out, buy a blank journal,  and start creating.  I find that is true for most of the women I work with- sometimes  offering them an “invitation”- or for some an assignment makes the process more available.  
 truth
 This is a picture of my very first journal entry.  I loved collecting beautiful greeting cards and this one shook me to my core.  It says : 
                 ” Truth Visiting
Be prepared to risk everything you hold precious for the truth inside you 
Truth is Empowering And to speak the truth Is to overcome the fear of death and on the other side of hell lies paradise.”
The card was from a series called- Revisiting our Souls- by Jane (which I always thought was so perfect as my last name is “Jayne”).
 
Looking back I realize how that moment was a turning point in my life.  I wasn’t ready to get married again.   I was terrified to break up with him for many reasons but mostly because I was letting everyone down.  Creating that first journal truly liberated my inner truth, and 19 years later I am still journaling 🙂